Today we are continuing with our Love Yourself series. Last week Molly spoke about loving your season. Which really spoke to many of our readers and myself as well. Today, I am going to talk to you about loving your limits. Its’s pretty cool that we are going to dive into this because it pairs great with last week’s post. Loving your limits is something I don’t think we pay attention to as much as we should. I know as a stay at home mom, people often time think that I have more free time than I actually do. More importantly and lesser known, I think we SAHM (stay at home moms) sometimes think that way too. We pile on the volunteer hours, pack on the playdates, commit to too many dinners, and then try to squeeze in activities for kids as well as household errands. Moms, what are we doing?
The same goes for working moms. Many people think that because you’ve been away from the house all day or away from the kids all day, you are all too eager to jump in and volunteer for things. I mean you’re gone all day, so how dirty can your house really get? (That was a totally sarcastic question by the way.) However, more importantly and lesser known, working moms can push themselves over the limit as well. So, how do we come to love our limits? First, we have to recognize them.
Last week, I was invited to an event. One that I really wanted to go to. I already knew that I didn’t have time, but I wanted to push myself anyway because it was for friends and I didn’t want to disappoint them. The time of the event was coming and my day had already been jammed packed. I was stuck in traffic because I live in MinneSNOWta (I love it here, truly) and there had been a huge snow fall the day before. Roads were still pretty bad in residential areas and I was going through those places because…my kids have activities. Anyway, by the time the other event got started, I was in traffic on the way home. Then when my husband finally made it home to watch the kids so I could leave, there was only 30 minutes left before the event ended. So, I couldn’t go. Now, anyone who would’ve looked at my schedule that day could have told you I wasn’t going to be able to make the event, but I wanted to push myself. I do that a lot because I love people and I love my friends. What I need to love though, more than anything, are my limits.
Once we recognize that we cannot do everything all the time, we need to accept it and move on. There cannot be any residual guilt attached to it. It’s okay to say no to some things if it means protecting yourself from burnout. God did not call us to the “people pleaser” ministry and so we need to remove ourselves from that category. He also did not call us to the “supermom” ministry. That’s not who you have to be in order to be effective. You just have to be PRESENT. So, go through the list of things that you “have” to do and see what can stay and what should go. Do you have to have playdates all week? Do you have to have dinner with your friends after work? Do you have to bake 4 dozen cookies for the school? If not, then set it aside for a different date or never. How about that? Never is good too.
Now that we have recognized and accepted our limits, we need to rest in it. See, just because you accept something, doesn’t mean you have peace with it. Resting in it brings about peace. Peace brings on love. So, moms are you ready to love your limits? Let’s practice it this month. RECOGNIZE, ACCEPT, AND REST= LOVE.