I Don’t Like Salads

I know what you’re thinking.  Is she actually going to write a full post on her disdain for salads?  Well, yes and no.  Although I could write several reasons why I don’t like salads, I’d rather explain why people think I do.  My family and I have been meat free for over 5 years.  The reason behind the decision is not as noble as you would think.  That, however, is a story for a different time.  Today I want to share my feelings on how people assume too many things about me as a mom based off limited information.  Just like people assume I like salads because I’m vegan.  I’m sure we have all done it at some point, but I’m writing this to expose that mindset so we can change it.  Ready moms?   

Have you ever seen the mom with only one child?  We often times assume she has all the time in the world because there’s only one.  Am I right?  Surely her house is always clean because one child doesn’t make that much of a mess.  Let’s totally forget how our lives looked when we (those of us with more than one) only had one child.  Remember sleepless nights, the uncertainty of their daily schedule, the piles of laundry…Yeah, mom with the only child doesn’t have it so easy. 

What about the mom who has teenage children?  She must have time to do whatever she wants.  Her children are self-sufficient.  While teenagers are able to do more on their own that doesn’t necessarily equate to moms doing less.  Enter in high school…sports, dances, rebellion (however tiny it may be), the big push for college, the talk, dates…should I go on?  Yeah, we don’t know them like we think. 

We do this too often.  We imagine these lives other moms lead based on small glimpses we see.  We assume this mom is a wonderful baker who does everything from scratch because she participated in one bake sale.  We have concluded that another mom’s is completely organized simply because she carries a planner.  On top of that, we then become bothered by them or even (dare I say it?) jealous?  It’s okay.  I will say it first so you don’t have to.  I am guilty of making assumptions about other moms and their lives.  I don’t want to continue to go down this path.  When we make these assumptions about one another, we take away the opportunity we have to learn about each other.  This in turn gives us the chance to learn from one another.  Isn’t that what we should be focusing on?  Learning from one another?  I think so.  I’ve met so many moms since moving to Minnesota and it’s been a joy to get to know them.  Putting aside my assumptions gave me the chance to hear their story.  You know what I learned?  We are all just momming it one day at a time. 

So, find some moms, lay down that old mindset, and learn something new.  For moms who want to learn something new about me, umm…hold the salad please.